FanHouse

That's Randy Johnson over there on the right, seemingly giving Hideo Nomo a wet willy for reasons that I've yet to ascertain. But I want you to take your focus away from Johnson's silly hijinx and instead focus on what you see flowing over the back of his neck: a glorious, glorious mullet. Remember, it's not a hair cut, it's a way of life.

Why do I point this out? Because Johnson's mullet surely ranks as one of baseball's all-time best, and in honor of the famed "business in the front, party in the back" coiffure, the White Sox have decided to hold Mullet Night tonight at U.S. Cellular Field, complete with a performance by a Poison tribute band as well as Great Clips haircut stations around the stadiums. (Sadly, this night isn't in honor of the FanHouse's own Mullet, but I'm sure he's welcome to attend ...) It gets better:

Then, march your mullet over to Gate 1 by 6:30 p.m., where the first 500 mulleted men and women will be invited to parade their classic cuts around the warning track. Wigged mullets will be accepted. Mulleted marchers will get a free White Sox Mullet Night T-shirt!

If you can't make the celebration, you can still partake in the festivities by reading the blog Bugs and Cranks, which has created an All-Mullet team. The rotation, of course, is anchored by none other than the Big Unit, but in case he can't finish the game, the ball will be in good hands with fellow party animals Mitch Williams and Rod Beck in the back of the bullpen. And with a lineup featuring Sal Fasano behind the plate, Robin Yount in the infield and Rob Deer in the outfield, you know Johnson will have all the run support (or at the very least, hair conditioner) he needs.