Your Latest Excuse to Post Aussie Rules Football Tackles: Real Footy Update - FanHouse - AOL Sports Blog

The entire purpose of this post is really just reporting a bit about Aussie Rules Football--which apparently keeps records and silly things like that. Why, we'll never know, since we just watch it for the savage flying elbows, instant concussions, and collisions that leave crash dummies wincing on the sidelines.

The records do count, in between all the action that would have players jailed and eventually deported in any other country. (Again, refer to Swindle's Theory Of Australian Manliness, mainly the idea that Australian is a game reserve for real men and their testosterone-based behavior, including unironic wearing of mustaches, heavy, bold beer-drinking, and wrestling sharks after a hearty helping of vodka. Or surviving shark bites to the head. Or pretty much anything involving shark/man contact where the man survives by doing something awesome.)

Real Footy has all your updates, including the team-by-team rundowns at the halfway mark in the season. Geelong stands 8-3 at the head of the standings, playing "an attractive, high-scoring brand of football." Geelong, like every other Aussie Footy team, is just waiting for you to say they look gay in the sleeveless unis and hot pants. We dare you to even just think it. They'll ride a great white shark across the Pacific with a pint in their hand and the reins in the other just to bury a cleat between your butt cheeks--we'd put money and a mustache on it.