Not a whole lot of drama surrounding the choice for "Wrath" this week, is there? Here's a hint: it's the same team that Cris Collinsworth believes is the best team he's ever seen.
The Bengals sin for Sloth in every facet of the game, and in every facet of life. The most prideful performer of Week 6, scoring a victory for old men everywhere, is Vinny Testaverde ... and if Joey Porter doesn't feel like he's in a position to be envious of a lot of people, then he's just not paying attention.
That, and much more, in this week's Seven Deadly Sins of Sunday.
For the player or team who unleashed their hellish fury on Sunday ...
The Sinner: The New England PatriotsIf that was indeed a Super Bowl preview, I'm going to go ahead and find something else to do on February 3rd. Suddenly, February 3rd feels like a good day to go fishing, learn needlepoint, or just kick back and enjoy the Puppy Bowl ... but a good day for competitive football, it won't be. Not if these two teams play again, because the Patriots are much, much better than the Cowboys.
Of course, Cowboys coach Wade Phillips disagrees. He believes the game was closer than the final score of 48-27 would indicate, saying "We could have stayed in the game ... obviously, what the final score looks like, it's a lot worse than it was."
I hate to ask the obvious, but if you could have stayed in the game ... why didn't you? Phillips (as did a lot of Cowboys fans) pointed to a play at the beginning of the 4th quarter, where the Cowboys kept the offense on the field for a 4th and 1. They handed off to Marion Barber, who beasted his way past the marker ... but then had it called back after an offensive lineman got caught holding.
Some people saw that as a turning point.
But I'm wondering exactly how many turning points there could have been in a game where the the Cowboys were outgained 448-283, they had the ball for 16 minutes and 30 seconds less than the Patriots (despite New England throwing throwing the ball way more than they ran it), and at no point did it look like the Dallas defense had a prayer of even slowing down Tom Brady and his band of merry playmakers.
Oh, and all of this happened in Dallas's own building, too ... and on a day when the Pats were down to Kevin Faulk and some guy named Kyle Eckel as their featured running backs. Imagine what the time of possession might've looked like if the Patriots had a running game. The Cowboys found a way to shut down the New England ground attack, put a lid on Randy Moss (for the most part), and even scored a fair amount of points themselves ... and still lost by three touchdowns.
So ... was it closer than it seemed? So close that there was a turning point?
If there was, it came this off-season when the Patriots traded for Moss, signed Wes Welker, signed Donte Stallworth, and decided that they were going to stomp a hole in everyone they played this season. That was your turning point. What New England did to the Cowboys on the field yesterday ... that was just one team being clearly superior to another.
For those who were unable to overcome their own slovenly inertia ...
The Sinner: The Cincinnati Bengals Larry Johnson's had his problems this year ... but nothing that a day against the Bengals defense couldn't fix, evidently.
LJ violated the 'Gals for 119 yards (106 of which came in the first half), and, more importantly, with the assistance of a helpful and friendly defense, finally remembered where the endzones are located.
Say what you want about the Bengals. Call them underachievers, call them selfish, call them losers ... but few teams in the NFL do more for the self-esteem of opposing running backs. They're givers, these Bengals ... if the entire world was made of running backs, the Cincinnati Bengals would be the United Way.
They gave up 117 rushing yards to Sammy Morris in Week 4. Jamal Lewis bulldozed them for 216 in Week 2. In Week 3, they gave up 100 to Shaun Alexander, who has looked over the past two weeks like it was time to drag him out behind Qwest Field and put a bullet in him, Old Yeller style. And today in Week 6, they spent the first half giving Larry Johnson the "¡Olé!" treatment.
And the offense that's supposed to be so explosive and so dangerous ... well, they were, sort of, but most of that was a product of playing from behind and the Chiefs being content to sit back and take it easy in the second half. Carson Palmer ended up throwing for 320 yards, and TJ Houshmandzadeh had a big day ... but a lot of the Bengals numbers today came in garbage time.
And here's another fantastic stat for the 'Gals: they've converted 1 of their last 17 third downs.
Add in the fact that Marvin Lewis and Chad Johnson had another minor sideline altercation today, that Johnson may or may not have quit on a route late in the game that let to a Carson Palmer interception, and the fact that Marvin Lewis didn't even seem unhappy that his team was just handled by the Kansas City Chiefs ... and this is a sad, sad group. Way sadder than your typical pitiful Bengals team, because this team doesn't have to be pitiful.
The Bengals find themselves face down in the gutter of the AFC North at 1-4, looking up at the Steelers, three full games ahead of them.
For the man who played with, gained, or displayed some dignity on Sunday ...
The Sinner: Vinny TestaverdeThere are a handful of Arizona Cardinals who were not potty-trained when Vinny Testaverde threw his first NFL touchdown pass 21 years ago.
And 21 years after that day, Vinny Testaverde again took the field and made some of those same young Cardinals once again soil themselves ... while Vinny went about the business of throwing touchdown passes.
What Vinny Testaverde accomplished yesterday is nothing short of amazing. He's 43 years old and spent the last few months sprawled out on his couch, collecting dust ... and with about 2 days of practice, he steps in and beats up a very decent Arizona Cardinals defense, en route to a convincing 25-10 Panthers upset victory.
He did everything you could have wanted him to do:
• Started the game 8-of-8
• Got the ball to Steve Smith (sounds easy enough, but there's at least one Panthers QB who can't do that, and yes, I'm looking at you, David Carr)
• Did not throw an interception
• Was not sacked an inordinate number of times (again, I'm looking at you, David Carr ... and by the way, David Carr, if it seems like I'm looking at you a lot, it's because you suck)
• Somehow convinced Cardinals cornerback Roderick Hook to spontaneously stop covering Steve Smith on a fly pattern down the sideline
• (Hopefully) forced David Carr out of the starting lineup for good
What can you say? If you didn't enjoy what Vinny Testaverde did yesterday, then you're either a Cardinals fan, or you hate old people. Accomplishing what he did at his age and state of inactivity ... it doesn't even make sense.
It makes you wonder what interception-happy quarterback of today will someday return at the age of 43, finally figure out how to not throw interceptions, and become a lovable and inspirational, yet completely immobile rallying point.
If you're a young NFL quarterback, and things aren't going your way right now ... don't give up. Vinny Testaverde once threw 13 TDs and 35 INTs in a year. What I'm saying is ... that 2022 could be your year, Joey Harrington. 2023 has your name's written all over it, Rex Grossman. And 2026 ... that's the year of Tarvaris Jackson.
For those who were left in a position to be jealous on Sunday ...
The Sinner: Joey Porter A brief list of people of whom Joey Porter could be envious:
• Kellen Winslow Jr., who caught 5 balls for 90 yards against Porter's Dolphins today, after Porter trash-talked him earlier in the week
• All members of 30 other NFL teams, who now have won at least one game
• The 219 other NFL players who have, unlike Joey Porter, recorded at least a half of a sack this year
• The roughly 6.6 billion people on this planet who are not about to be sued by Levi Jones
You could sit down and rack your brain for a while, and not be able to envision a day where someone would look like more of a jackass than Joey Porter looked like yesterday.
It started just before the 1:00 games yesterday, when Fox Sports' Jay Glazer aired the casino surveillance videotape of Joey and his friends beating up Levi Jones in the Palms in Vegas (you can see it here).
You can't hear anything, and you don't know what's said ... but you do see Porter and three of his friends just start raining punches on Levi Jones. Porter appears to throw the first shot, Jones starts punching back, and then three of Porter's friends bumrush Jones. Whatever happened to start it, I don't know ... but it ended with a 4-on-1 beating.
That's pretty manly, Joey. Maybe if you had three of your boys to help you take on every blocker, you could get past one of them every now and then. Maybe if you had three of your boys to help cover Kellen Winslow, he wouldn't be toasting you down the middle of the field.
The Dolphins lost, Porter was invisible, and Winslow got over on him.
Enjoy 0-6, buddy ... and enjoy the lawsuit that Jay Glazer seems pretty sure is on its way.
For those who gorged themselves on big, beautiful numbers yesterday ...
The Sinner: Adrian Peterson: 20 carries, 224 yards, 3 TDs. It's a good thing the Vikings didn't elect to skip this particular draft pick, because if they had. they'd be entirely without an offense right now.
Peterson was single-handedly responsible for the Minnesota Adrian Petersons' 34-31 win yesterday over the Chicago Devin Hesters. Peterson averaged 11.2 yards a carry against the supposedly formidable Chicago defense.
And he did this while, I'm guessing, Tarvaris Jackson's 9/23, 136 yard passing performance didn't do much to help back the defense off.
Even on the return game, Peterson was dangerous. He took one back to the Chicago 36 ... at which point, Ricky Manning Jr. tackled him by his pants, and then, as Peterson stood up, Manning got a delightful face full of Peterson's sweaty cheeks.
The end of that play served as a nice metaphor for the entire game.
Tom Brady: 31/46, 388 yards, 5 TDs
Derek Anderson: 18/25, 245 yards, 3 TDs
Drew Brees: 25/36, 246 yards, 2 TDs
David Garrard: 22/34, 221 yards, 2 TDs
Jeff Garcia: 20/31, 274 yards, 1 TD
LaDainian Tomlinson: 24 carries, 198 yards, 4 TDs
Maurice Jones-Drew: 12 carries, 125 yards, 2 TDs
DeAngelo Williams: 10 carries, 121 yards, 1 TD
Larry Johnson: 31 carries, 119 yards, 1 TD
Thomas Jones: 24 carries, 130 yards
TJ Houshmandzadeh: 8 receptions, 145 yards, 2 TDs
Wes Welker: 11 receptions, 124 yards, 2 TDs
Steve Smith: 10 receptions, 136 yards, 1 TD
Donte Stallworth: 7 receptions, 136 yards, 1 TD
Tony Gonzalez: 9 receptions, 102 yards, 2 TDs
Braylon Edwards: 5 receptions, 67 yards, 3 TDs
Kevin Walter: 12 receptions, 160 yards
Bobby Engram: 9 receptions, 120 yards
For those who just couldn't stop burying themselves in hopelessness ...
The Sinner: Gus Frerotte: 19/36, 208 yards, 0 TDs, 5 INTs. Those are terrifyingly horrific numbers ... but I only blame about 20% of that performance on Frerotte himself. Life is hard for a quarterback without a running game. Or 80% of his receiving corps. Or an offensive line.
Frerotte was sacked 4 times, but that doesn't begin to tell the story of just how battered he was yesterday. He had to leave the game with 1:05 left on the clock, and rather than put another quarterback in and risk his life, the Rams opted to put WR Marques Hagans (5 receptions, 74 yards) under center, and let him down the ball twice. Trailing by 18. With a minute left to play. Kneeling on it. That's just sad.
Tim Rattay: 12/24, 159 yards, 0 TDs, 3 INTs
Brett Favre: 19/37, 188 yards, 0 TDs, 2 INTs
Sammy Morris: 10 carries, 14 yards
Brian Leonard: 12 carries, 18 yards
Earnest Graham: 13 carries, 29 yards
LaMont Jordan: 18 carries, 42 yards
William McGahee: 25 carries, 61 yards
Shaun Alexander: 17 carries, 43 yards
Laveranues Coles: 1 reception, 27 yards
Antwaan Randle-El: 2 receptions, 25 yards
Santana Moss: 0 receptions, 0 yards
The best in photos from Sunday's NFL action, hopefully focusing on cheerleaders more than anything else ...
Not one usable picture of an NFL cheerleader in Getty Images this week. Not one. I did cheat and dip into the college ranks, though, and there is a shot of Kate Hudson at the Patriots/Cowboys game. I do what I can for you.
And if this picture of Antonio Gates bathing in the San Diego sunlight brings about some lustful feelings inside you ... I don't think you should feel one little bit of shame about that.
 Saints QB Drew Brees on his team's 28-17 win over Seattle on Sunday night:"This was us."Tremendous. Mind telling us where the hell you've been? The Saints did indeed look like the Saints of last year, with Drew Brees throwing effectively and efficiently, and Reggie Bush providing them with a ground game. And David Patten, who I didn't even know was still in the league, came out of nowhere to give Drew Brees a target in the passing game. The Seahawks helped, too, as Shaun Alexander continues to look like he's running barefoot through four feet of toothpaste. And it probably wouldn't have mattered, but that "clock management" at the end of the game by the Seahawks was positively bizarre. |
Random Janitor Responsible for Cleaning the Visitors' Locker Room in Texas Stadium:"Dammit, I hate the Patriots."I'm guessing at that quote. But the janitorial staff couldn't have been happy with the Pats. Because Terrell Owens ended a mid-week locker room note with the worlds, "Getcha Popcorn Ready," someone in the Patriots locker room was throwing popcorn into the air in the Pats' locker room after the game. Not that I'll ever be worried about anyone offending Terrell Owens, but ... can the Patriots do anything without taunting someone? It's such odd behavior from a team that's been everywhere and done everything before. This was a mid-season game against a team from the inferior conference ... and they can't win without some rubbing-it-in taunting? It would be nice if they were as classy as they were good. |
 Terrell Owens, responding to the question, "How did Moss play today?":"Next question."From there, Owens offered some garbage about how it's a team game, and he issued the note early in the week because he didn't want all kinds of questions about the 81 vs. 81 matchup, blah blah blah ... but if that's how he really felt, why bother calling himself "the original 81" and Moss "the other 81"? I guess it works for him ... he can gloat if he wins, and go into the "it's a team game" routine if he loses. |
Cris Collinsworth on the Patriots:"To be perfectly honest, I think this is the best team I've ever seen."On one hand ... it's only Week 6, and they did just give up 27 points. But on the other hand ... dear God, they do look unbeatable right now. |
 Jets TE Chris Baker on a 3rd-and-1 play call that wasn't a handoff to Thomas Jones:"Thomas [Jones] had 100 yards in the first half ... and we don't give him the ball on third-and-one ... no, it didn't surprise me. That's the problem; I wasn't surprised by it." You know, it seems like Chris Baker is hinting at something there. I get an odd sense that he might not be completely happy with the play-calling being done by the Jets coaching staff. |
Jets safety Kerry Rhodes after his team's loss to the Eagles:"F***************!"A shorter and more effective way of saying the same thing Chris Baker said. |
 Santana Moss on his performance yesterday against the Packers:"I took myself out. Something wasn't feeling right with me, and why go out there and keep another guy from helping us win? There was (doo-doo) going on and I wasn't making the plays that I should have been making."Santana's being really hard on himself there, which, mind you, is not the same thing as saying he's being too hard ... in fact, I think that's a pretty accurate assessment of his own play. He was miserable. I'm not saying I'd hold him solely responsible for the Redskins loss or anything ... the guy just had a rough game. It happens. The Redskins left a lot of things out there on the field yesterday, and their pass defense, for the second week in a row, looked formidable. I have a feeling that if they see the Packers again, they'll like the outcome a bit better next time. |
Raiders head coach Lane Kiffin after the 28-14 loss to the Chargers:"We came out today and played like really bad football teams play."Yes. If that was merely an impression of a really bad football team, it was an excellent one. Totally and utterly convincing. |
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Reader Comments ( Page 1 of 1)
1. Nice work as always MJD. Although I disagree with your LJ assessment. The Chiefs offense still has major problems and the running game is one of them.
Posted at 11:09AM on Oct 15th 2007 by Chris
2. "This was a mid-season game against a team from the inferior conference ... and they can't win without some rubbing-it-in taunting? It would be nice if they were as classy as they were good."
Now I like to bride myself on not being one of the obnoxious Patriot fans. But the past 6 seasons this team had been the model for class in the nfl. But now if everyone's going to jump on the anti-Patriot bandwagon and call them classless(LT, Browns guard Eric Steinbech, etc), and try to diminish everything they've accomplished over the past few seasons, then to hell with it. People are against them anyway, it's not as if there are any enemies left for them to gain.
Posted at 11:23AM on Oct 15th 2007 by OD
3. Pride, not bride.
Posted at 11:23AM on Oct 15th 2007 by OD
4. I've found that it is easy too root against cheaters.
Posted at 11:39AM on Oct 15th 2007 by DookieStyle
5. Its almost too funny. The more people bash the Patriots, the more they give the Patriots a reason to win big. Sour grapes!!! I for one am very proud of the Patriots. They are on there way to being the best pro football team ever. Too bad some of you just cant addmit it. Way to go Pats!!!
Posted at 1:11PM on Oct 15th 2007 by George
6. You forgot that Brett Favre just broke another record he says he doesn't care about. He's now the ALL TIME leading thrower . . . of interceptions!
I bleed Green and Gold (unless the Cubs are playing), but won more money betting that Brett will throw more interceptions than touchdowns. Put that down for next week's Greed list!
Posted at 1:56PM on Oct 15th 2007 by Jim Michalek
7. Wade says.. "We could have stayed in the game ... obviously, what the final score looks like, it's a lot worse than it was." I suppose that is one way to look at it. Of course another way would be to see it could have been a lot worse. Brady could not have shown his human side at all. He could have held on to that ball tighter and not given Dallas a TD on his fumble. He could have connected on those two flea flickers rather than overthrowing his target missing easy TD's. Randy Moss could have not had those TD's called back. Yes, Tom Brady could have thrown for seven TD's instead of five. I'm sure if they do meet again Coach Belichick will make sure they do not make such silly mistakes in the Super Bowl.
Posted at 3:02PM on Oct 15th 2007 by Joe
8. Enjoy it now Pats fans nothing lasts forever. Just ask Cowboys fan from the 1990's. That is why i never jump on bandwagons either Cowboys or Pats. Giants right or wrong, win or lose.
Posted at 3:11PM on Oct 15th 2007 by tobrien28
9. All i have to say is how about dem patriots
Posted at 6:20PM on Oct 15th 2007 by hutch0868
10. Of course nothing lasts forever, that's why Pats fans are enjoying this as much as possible. The time will come when it's our turn to be the bottom rung of the nfl, so the good days have to be enjoyed while they last. Then it'll be some other team that gets rallied against.
Posted at 7:53PM on Oct 15th 2007 by OD
11. OD, you said it. enjoy it while you can, and understand that people will hate you because you are good. I don't see many people invading Lions blogs making bold predictions and calling the team and their fans names. LOL. It's all good. I was was fan when the Pats were the Patsies. I am here for the ride, knowing that there will be envy everywhere.
Posted at 8:04PM on Oct 16th 2007 by joe wallace