FanHouse

Every day from Monday to Saturday, The Ice Sheet will take a look at the biggest stories in the league that happened on the ice and elsewhere the night before.

The best thing about the NHL All-Star Game voting is that there aren't a bunch of media wonks and hyperactive pollsters over-analyzing and underestimating potential results. For 21 of yesterday's 24 hours, every talking head on cable television was telling me one candidate was so far ahead in the polls that he was already working on his first State of the Union address; in the last three hours, after this future king's opponent was victorious in New Hampshire, their best explanation was several variations of "Hey, wha' happened?"

The worst thing about the NHL All-Star Game voting is that, at best, it's a farce. Last year's Vote for Rory shenanigans had their valorous virtues, but exposed the process as a sham two steps up from a secondary school student council election, full of ballot box stuffing and silly popularity contest posturing that defies any reward a player should deserve for a dynamic first half of the season.

Now that we know the starters, let's take a look as some of the more interesting and baffling numbers in the 2008 All-Star balloting...

(Coming Up Next: Last Night's Losers, Mexican Wrestling Puckheads, Arrested Development vs. The Office in Hockey Terms, Tonight's Games You Should Be Watching, and Either the Most Loathesome of Wickedly Amusing All-Star Game Video You've Ever Seen.)

Los Angeles Kings Fans -- Mike Cammalleri gets 165,042 votes, fourth in the Western Conference. Anze Kopitar gets 64,856, way back in the pack despite leading the Kings in scoring. What gives, L.A. fans? Can 10 goals in 10 games really earn you over 100,000 more votes than your team's best offensive player?

St. Louis Fans -- Hey, thanks for your 21 goals, Brad Boyes. Too bad Blues fans couldn't get their act together and try to vote you into the All-Star Game. Then again, they didn't really give Keith Tkachuk (32,576) any help either; 14 games of Marty Havlat garnered more votes than any Blues player outside of Paul Kariya (76,703), who obviously was helped by some old friends in Anaheim and Nashville. The Blues are averaging 17,383 fans per home game; do any of them have access to a computer?

Eric Staal, Carolina -- Forty-one points in 45 games, and Carolina can only deliver 35,179 votes, putting him behind Vyacheslav Kozlov (39,528). NHL '08 cover curse LOL!!!!1!!!1!

Jason Arnott, Nashville -- As of this morning, three points separate David Legwand (33) from Jason Arnott (36) in the Predators' scoring race. The spread between the two in the All-Star voting? That would be 113,407 votes.

Scott Gomez, New York Rangers -- In the case of Gomez, the all-star voting actually offer some interesting insight. Even though he currently leads the Rangers in points -- the offensive equivalent of being the tallest Ewok -- the general opinion on Gomez for most of the season is that he's been an under-whelming, ill-fitting bust. That came through in the voting totals, as his 26,936 ranked behind Chris Drury (92,337), Jaromir Jagr (72,646) and Brendan Shanahan (46,016). He also ranked behind his old EGG Line mate Patrik Elias (47,536), and that's perhaps the largest factor in Gomez's low total: Unlike Drury, who probably received a few votes from old friends in Buffalo and Colorado, Devils fans feel about Gomer like Barry Melrose's wallet feels about Newark.

Last Night's Losers

• Another loss for the Rangers means another loss closer to a personnel shake-up. But as Zachary Schiff warns: "They need to be wary of getting another Sandis Ozolish."
• The Bruins came up short against Cam Ward and Carolina, 1-0. They were like the Jim Rice of teams playing the Carolina Hurricanes last night.
• Buffalo is on its longest losing streak since Dec. 2003 after losing to Marty Brodeur in the skills competition.
• Atlanta loses to Philly, 4-1. Don Waddell on Mark Recchi: "He may not be as fast as he once was, but the smartness has not gone away."
• Montreal honors Blackhawks legends before beating the Blackhawks, 4-3 in OT. I wonder if they served Stan Mikita donuts in the press box.
• Even though the Penguins were victorious yesterday, I don't think any link to the Florida Panthers will be as rewarding as The Pens Blog's recap: "Rock Out With Your Conk Out."
• Colorado should be exhausted when I see them tonight against the Capitals after chasing Detroit around all night in a 1-0 loss. By the way: Darren McCarty=traitor.
• Minus Pascal Leclaire, the Blue Jackets get bombed, 6-1, by the Blues.
• Hey, here's a shock: Gretzky beats the Flames.
• Even on a night when Roberto Luongo looked like he attended "the Arturs Irbe puck handling school," the Islanders can't top the Canucks.
• Jason LaBarbera allows three goals on seven shots before being pulled, and the Predators beat LA, 7-0. Kings fans quietly yearn for the stoic consistency of Dan Cloutier.

This Really Has Nothing To Do With Hockey, But...

Ice Cube is nearly set to play B.A. Baracus in the big screen version of "The A-Team." Dr. Dre for Hannibal!

The NHL: It's Fan-tstic!



It wasn't enough that the NHL scored record ratings, captured the imagination of the sports media and may have created an annual tradition on New Year's Day with the Winter Classic. No, the NHL had to also snag the most sought after fan community among sports marketing experts: Overweight, Pittsburgh-based Luchadores.

This Week's Glimpse Into the Maddeningly Awesome World of the HF Boards

I'm not sure HF Boards member Timo's preview of a recent Islanders/Oilers game is all that funny, but it sure is clever: Casting the two teams as members of the late, great "Arrested Development" and NBC's "The Office." I think Kevin Lowe as George SR. Bluth is spot-on; but Rick DiPietro as Jim Halpert is a little bit of a charisma stretch. And how is Dwight Schrute anyone but Andy Sutton?

In any event, congrats Timo ... your Aitch Effy is IN THE MAIL!

Tonight's Games You Should Be Watching

• The Capitals take on the Avalanche here in DC, where myself, McErlain and JP may have a little meeting of the minds and gullets at some point. By the way: That Mike Vogel is one hell of a writer.
• Dallas visits Chicago. Did you know that if you win Governor for the Day in Illinois that you get a massage AND 'Hawks tickets?
• Even with the injuries, Leafs + Ducks = Fights, maybe.

Gratuitous YouTube Embed

With the All-Star voting behind us, we can start looking forward to the actual game. Hopefully, The Angry T will not be in the Versus booth, because he really doesn't understand the game all that well. Or maybe he understands it too well. I can't tell. This video is both offensive and somewhat hilarious, and the clear lack of understanding about the League and the sport sort of reminds me of when ESPN had the NHL TV rights. Some classic Bettman material, too: