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On Opening Day last season, the Indians began their run to an AL Central division crown with a 12-5 drubbing of the White Sox at US Cellular Field. This year the season starts with the Indians and White Sox one more time, but this time, it's in Cleveland. The good news is that there's no snow in the forecast in Cleveland, so we don't have to worry about this one being snowed out like the Indians home opener last season.

The even better news is that I'll be live-blogging the entire game for you right here at FanHouse. Of course, for those of you who aren't already aware, I'm a White Sox fan. So expect completely biased opinions and witty rejoinders after the jump.

Pregame

Ok, so I'm ready for this game to get started. I got my Joe Crede jersey on, my hat, and of course, a beer at my side. Let's get this mother started already.

In a special pre-game segment on Comcast SportsNet Chicago, Kenny Williams was asked what one word he'd use to describe Ozzie Guillen. He chose "loyal." Personally I would have gone with "bat#!*& insane." Yes, I realize that's two words, but I'm a rebel and I don't play by your rules.

Sit back, relax, and strap it down. First pitch is coming up.

Top 1st

C.C. Sabathia faces Nick Swisher to lead off the game, and the first pitch of the 2008 season is swung at and fouled off. I thought Swisher was supposed to be patient? He damn near fell down swinging at that. And two pitches later Swisher grounds out to Asdrubal Cabrera for the inning's first out.

I don't know why the Indians are busting out the throwbacks on Opening Day, but I'm not complaining. I like them. Simple and to the point.

Orlando Cabrera begins his White Sox tenure with a four-pitch walk from Sabathia. Runner on first, one out, and here comes Jim Thome to the requisite chorus of boos by bitter Tribe fans. Cabrera steals second without even a throw from Victor Martinez. Orlando got a three step jump on C.C. there.

And Jim Thome is now 1-for-12 lifetime against Sabathia, as he just made it 2-0 White Sox with a rope into the right center bleachers. YOU CAN PUT IT ON THE BOARD! YES!!! Keep booing him, please.

Paul Konerko then follows Thome's blast with a strikeout. Don't tell me he's settled in now.

Sabathia then strikes out Jermaine Dye to end the inning. 2-0 White Sox.

Bottom 1st

It figures, this is the first time I've ever live-blogged anything, and I'll have to do so in a game Mark Buerhle is pitching. By the time I finish typing each sentence, he'll have thrown 3 pitches.

And we nearly have our first collision of the year, as Alexei Ramirez and Jermaine Dye nearly run into each other catching Grady Sizemore's flyout.

Jason Michaels then follows Sizemore with a sharp ground out to third. Joe Crede makes it look easy though, because, well, he's awesome.

Buehrle then strikes out Travis Hafner on three pitches. Very quick inning for the Tribe and Buehrle. I don't even have time to make fun of Hafner.

Top 2nd

I think this Parliament Light I'm smoking weighs more than Alexei Ramirez. Who then immediately puts every ounce of his 45 pounds in a ground ball to Casey Blake. One down.

A.J. Pierzynski doubles down the first base line, and the Sox have another runner in scoring positiion for Joey Clutch. Sabathia better get his act together. He does, and he gets Crede to pop up behind second base.

$20 Juan Uribe swings at first pitch. And I already owe somebody $20. Uribe goes down on strikes, and Pierzynski is stranded at second base.

Bottom 2nd

If you aren't watching the White Sox feed of this game, you're missing out on the opportunity to see Nick Swisher dance. Which is a damn shame for you.

And that man that terrifies me like no other in this Cleveland lineup, Victor Martinez, starts the inning off with a single up the middle. There goes the no-hitter. We were so close!

Do you think the nurse at the hospital made a mistake on Jhonny Peralta's birth certificate? If his parents did that on purpose, they should be shot. Peralta then hits a line drive to short that knocks Orlando Cabrera on his butt. Should have been a double play, now we got two on and nobody out.

Ryan Garko singles to left, and the bases are loaded with still nobody out. Thank you, Orlando Cabrera.

Thank you, Jesus. Asdrubal Cabrera hits a rope down the third base line, but it's just foul. Full count. Cabrera grounds to short, but the Sox can't turn the double play. 2-1 with runners at the corners and one down.

Franklin Gutierrez has emptied the bases with a three-run blast to left field. Well, at least I got to enjoy an inning and a half first. 4-2 Tribe.

Casey Blake grounds out, two down.

Is it too early in the season for me to start hating Orlando Cabrera? Should I give him more time?

5-2 Indians as Grady Sizemore just made 20 new lady friends with a solo shot to right. Sigh.

And the Indians will bat around this inning as Buehrle walks Jason Michaels. Travis Hafner is on his way to the plate, and Don Cooper is on his way to the mound. Mark has already thrown 40 pitches in the game.

Am I the only one who sees Shrek when Hafner stands at the dish? Just put two little green antennas on the top of his head, and voila.

Pronk is not amused by my comments, and shows his displeasure by doubling down the line to bring in Michaels. Screw you, Travis. 6-2 Indians. And all of a sudden my beer consumption has doubled. Not even the sweet, sweet taste of Red Stripe can console me now.

Nick Masset is warming up in the bullpen for the White Sox. Awesome.

Victor Martinez now has two hits this inning, as he brings Hafner in with a single to right. It's now 7-2 Indians, and I'm wondering when Bears mini-camp starts.

Ozzie Guillen is going to the bullpen. Mark Buehrle is on his way to the clubhouse for some Preparation H right now, as I imagine his anus is sore.

Buehrle's final line: 1.2IP, 7 hits, 7 runs, and one pissed off live-blogger.

HAHAHAHAHAHA. Victor Martinez just made himself look like a fool as he literally rolled into second base instead of sliding. Feet first, Victor. Not the hips. The White Sox are finally out of the inning. I'd say I hope Martinez isn't hurt, but I'd be lying.

Top 3rd

Okay, so there's some guy in his underwear climbing on a Kia singing a parody of Right Said Fred's "I'm Too Sexy." I fear I've now been rendered completely impotent.

Victor Martinez has been replaced behind the plate by Kelly Shoppach, and I actually do hope it's nothing serious. Just something that may keep him out of the next, oh, I don't know, two games?

Nick Swisher gets his first hit in a Sox uniform, as he singles the other way to right field. And now Orlando Cabrera has a chance to redeem himself.

Note to Orlando Cabrera: Striking out isn't the best way to redeem yourself. You're on the list, pal.

Jim Thome now leads baseball with two home runs this season. This one was really helped out by the wind, as there's no way it should have been more than a fly out to center. I'll still take it though. 7-4 Indians.

Konerko grounds out to third, two down.

Jermaine Dye doubles off the top of the left field fence, and the ball is jumping at Jacobs Progressive Field today. We may be looking at a 14-12 type game here today.

Seriously, Calista Flockhart (she still relevant?) is watching this game somewhere saying that Alexei Ramirez "really needs to eat a damn sandwich." Which he can now go eat in the clubhouse as he goes down on strikes and the inning comes to an end.

Bottom 3rd

Jhonny Peralta begins the Cleveland half of the third with a swinging strikeout.

How many Donnie Darko/Darko Milicic jokes do you think Ryan Garko is subjected to on a daily basis? I'm setting the over/under at four. Three of which are by Travis Hafner. Garko grounds back to the pitcher, and heads back to the bench for Travis Hafner to talk about evil rabbits some more. Two down.

Asdrubal Cabrera grounds out to Juan Uribe to end the inning and this portion of the live-blog. Follow me to innings 4-6.