FanHouse

International Pastime looks at baseball's influence outside the U.S.

Jose Lima can be thankful for many things. He's blessed with an ample-bosomed wife, a wonderful voice, genital herpes and, every now and then, a right arm that can retire hitters with great effectiveness. The last of those times was in 2004, though, which is why Lima found himself signing a contract to pitch for the Kia Tigers of the Korean League before this season.

Kia hoped that the addition of Lima and other major league washouts would lift them out of the cellar. No such luck. Kia's lost 11 of their first 15 and Lima's compiled a 6.23 ERA while striking out just under three batters per nine innings of work. Predictably, he was released this afternoon.

How was the news received in his new country? East Windup Chronicle does the translating.

He leaves Korea not having won a single game, as the headline on the Korean Web portal Naver gleefully reads: "Not one win gathered...Lima is Kicked Out!"

That's a fitting final nail in the coffin of a career that was always a bit longer on off-field entertainment value than on-field achievement. Let that be a lesson to the mediocre starters of the future. If you're going to give up 48 homers in a season, do it colorfully and no one will mind as much.