FanHouse

Pop quiz, hot shots. The phrase "half past dead" refers to which of the following:

A) A lyric in The Band's classic song, "The Weight;"

B) Steven Seagal's timeless cinematic treasure "Half Past Dead," co-starring noted thespian Ja Rule;

C) Kevin Grady's state of being early Wednesday morning.

If you guessed A, you're over 40 years old. If you guessed B, you are a fine connoisseur of cinema. For everybody else, yes, C is the right answer. The Michigan tailback, one of several looking to take over the departed Mike Hart's carries, was arrested on "suspicion" of DUI. We say "suspicion" because Grady blew a .281, which is more than three and a half times higher than the legal limit in Michigan and most other states.

Just for the sake of further context, .080 is legally drunk. .200 will absolutely ruin your weekend. .400 is enough to kill people.

So, if anything, Grady is lucky in that he didn't kill anybody--or himself. Again, he blew a .281. He does, however, find himself in the unfortunate position of being incoming head coach Rich Rodriguez's first serious disciplinary case, which makes it unlikely that he'll escape with anything less than serious punishment. As first offenses go, OWIs almost never result in dismissals, but the mind-blowing particulars probably mean Grady's not seeing the field in any meaningful action until at least October.