FanHouse - AOL Sports Blog

We could have come up with a less contrived headline, but we didn't. Deal. The fact is that after a sudden surge in popularity in Europe, SlamBall has set its eyes back on forming a professional league in America. For unaweseome uninitiated, SlamBall is the basketball-trampoline hybrid that thrilled late night audiences on Spike TV before they started running nonstop Most Xtreme Elimination marathons.

The brutality and "Xtreme" nature of the sport, like most "new" sports, have always made us long for someone to step up and form a professional Rollerball league. James Caan or Chris Klein versions, we don't care, but we would pay to see shot puts thrown from motorcycles. Regardless, the roots of this current incarnation to the league are very similar. Europeans are seemingly eating it up, and the league is prepared to go webcast only until a TV deal is secured. Meanwhile, franchises are expected to be sold in the low 7-figures. Maybe when this whole blogging for money thing pays off we can retire to be some kind of future-sport oligarch.

The following clip shows off the majesty of grown men risking broken necks for open-court checking and 17-foot tomahawks. Basic Rules at the 2:00 mark.

(HT: Sporting Blog by way of With Leather)

What is it lately with the Europeans and their sports odysseys? Is it because us Americans aren't trying that hard or is it because we at Das FanHaus read BBC more than healthy Americans should? Anyway, the second feel-good story for this afternoon's edition of "FanHaus' People" is 17-year-old Rachel Flanders, now the youngest personto ever row across the Atlantic. Yeah, row. The Atlantic. With three other Englishwomen dubbed the "Atlantic Angels," Flanders made the trip from the Canary Islands to Antigua in 75 days. While they were unable to break the current record of 67 days, there is still the recognition of a job very well done as well as Rachel's milestone. We're still trying to figure out how four people can row in 2 hour shifts for 75 days, in the middle of the freaking Atlantic, while making any kind of news that doesn't include the words "search party."

Congratulations, again, to Rachel and the Angels. Read more about their trip at, where else, the BBC.

Photo courtesy of BBC

Opening up a pair of feel-good stories of people doing extraordinary random acts of sport is the tale of Mark Beaumont, a 25 year old Scotsman who shattered world record for cycling around the globe. He accomplished the feat in 195 days, a far cry from the previous record of 276. A journey that carried him from Paris east through Asia, then across Australia and America, Beaumont faced all sorts of challenges across 4 continents. The most intense? In the midst of his 12 hour shifts and constant travel, Beaumont's biggest ordeals seemed to occur in the Southeast US, having been hit by an elderly motorist and mugged along the way. We're sure there's plenty of other interesting yarns from his Magellan-esque adventures, and hopefully more international fare, over at the BBC. Check out the interactive maps, podcasts, and other fancy internet diaries that accompany the main article.

Today's dose unnecessary injury comes from South Korea and everyone's favorite reason for self-mutilation, compulsory military service. The Guardian reports of the orthopedic shenanigans coming out of Seoul, and the specific injury of choice for dodgy Seoul 'mates, shoulder dislocation:

The players, including 15 professional K-League players, dislocated their shoulders by methods such as swinging their arms while holding heavy weights or having fellow players jump on their shoulders, the official said.

That's a lot of pain to keep playing on your semi-pro pub team if you ask us. The offending players will be pressed into 2 years of community service with the possibility of military or jail time in some cases. Their local friendly surgeon who decided to fix them back up without telling the authorities will also face criminal charges. If it were us, we would probably wait until we got into the army before injuring ourselves. It would probably save us some serious PT and nab us a cozy desk job on the DMZ.

Having all kind of interesting ways to kill yourself in the name of extreme sport, we have to say trapping yourself under a frozen lake has to be the new number 1. Without the use of any kind of scuba gear, teams of 2 play just under the surface, upside down, using only precut "breathing holes" to take 30 second time outs. Usually, when a sport requires a team of doctors on hand just to practice, its already pretty extreme, but adding on to that the fact that time outs are needed to simply stay alive, we start to understand why no one thought of doing this sooner.

Reuters Video (HT: The Big Picture) gives the sport the Euro-news treatment, refined accent, dubbed translation, and all. Jump to the 1:00 mark to hear about the sports future as a spectator sport ... if you like standing in the middle of a lake watching TV. Its kind of like ice fishing but without the cool little shacks.

Das FanHaus is not entirely sure how many rules we are breaking with this lunchtime diversion, but we are certain that the following will offend at least one reader. It may be considered brutish to some, but there is still some nobility in the concept of a wee wrestler soaring through a folding table to best his opponent. While we support the breadth and depth of the little people arts, we know that nothing steals the thunder more than competitive acts of violence.

If you have the means, we suggest viewing the following clip with sound. We find it adds to the overall atmosphere. "WHOO!"

Das FanHaus has pored over several crazy feats in its brief tenure, but we end this week with one that is sure to stay firmly near the top of the list for a very long time. Skydiver extraordinaire, Greg Gasson shows us all how to jump out of an airplane with as little sanity as possible. Enjoy the weekend.

(HT to the aptly titled Mad Skies)

One of the great mysteries of the competitive eating world has finally been explained. The question: Why do Thin Guys Always Win Eating Contests? Bypassing the unfair generalizations that overlook some of the sport's original, more traditionally corpulent champions, Das FanHaus always fine such intense study of the lesser appreciated sports fascinating. The article, originally from PopSci.com, explains:

Muscles stretch when they relax, and when we eat a big meal, our stomach muscles relax so much that they send a message to the brain, which interprets the signal to mean a full belly. Then our brain stops us from eating anymore. But a good training regimen deadens this communication, causing "the signal to the brain or the brain itself to become less responsive to the large volume of food," says Douglas Seidner, M.D., program director for clinical nutrition at the Cleveland Clinic. In other words, you can eat yourself numb, or at least deaden your urge to stop.

Thus explains one of the true paradoxes of speed-eating. Das FanHaus would like to think that there's some kind of secret lab in Japan, or possible Coney Island, where such studies consist of hot dog gorging while being hooked up to all sort of fancy monitoring equipment. Something like those Gatorade ads, but with
more ketchup than sweat.

As said during the SImpsons' trip to Tokyo, "Japanese game shows are a bit different than those in America. You reward knowledge, we punish ignorance." This is what makes the Happy Super Fun Challenge Family Wish Shows of the Far East so darn amusing. Das FanHaus holds a certain awe for the creative, mostly twisted, minds that create such unique forms of acceptable torture. We still hold out hope that such a trend will take on in America, without dubbing or subtitles, and possibly involving current celebrities. Given the current state of the writers strike and inevitable influx of reality and game show programming, there's still hope.

The following clip can only be described as whack-a-mole meets "Save us Spectraman!" There is sound, but retaining a low volume is highly recommended. Also, certain props are speculated to be pork products, so the clip may not be kosher in that regard. Enjoy the large novelty Annual Gift Man in the background as well.

Hippies of Ultimate Frisbee, take up your hackysacks and serapes! To arms! There's a new game in town across New England's small liberal arts colleges, so prepare to have a Muggle-style freakout. Quidditch, the beautiful game of Harry Potter's wizarding world, is taking on as the new favorite quadrangle activity of those theatre types in pleasant weather. Frisbee meets lacrosse meets live-action role playing (Lightning Bolt!) and Das FanHaus is still wavering on providing its full support for the budding movement. The rules may need a bit of refining, and we may just need to wait for the widespread availability of hoverboards to really get the quaffle rolling on this. Something about running around on brooms is more overtly silly than skillful.



Living the Scientific Life, the founder of this FanHaus feast, also adds that some prospective students are choosing schools based on their Quidditch facilities. We await future Quidditch BCS games with bated breath.