Phil Knight laughts in Texas A&M's general direction. And Michigan's, but for totally different reasons.

Texas A&M is one of a few schools switching from Athletic Death Star Nike to Adidas (No, not "adidas," since it's morally wrong to de-cap a proper noun) this fall for various reasons.

Michigan's reason: Adidas gave them more money than any school in the country and guaranteed them "most favored nation" status wherein Michigan would always be the top-paid Adidas school.

Texas A&M? Well, not so much. They went to Nike, asking for the same terms as main rival Texas. Predictably, Nike said "scoreboard":


Ouch. That's a squeeze in the nuts.

During Friday's spring practice, tempers flared, and helmets went flying when Texas A&M senior defensive Michael Bennett tangled with some offensive linemen. It is certainly not uncommon for small tussles to breakout during a football practice, especially among linemen who battle it out play after play. What's a bit unusual in this case, however, was new head coach Mike Sherman's strong reaction to what was actually the second fight of the day.

"We don't need that bull crap..."

As the Aggie players ran 50-yard sprints up and down the field, Sherman told them that intrasquad fights wouldn't be tolerated.

"We've got soft players," he said. "If you want to be average, then transfer."

It sounds like Sherman is really attempting to balance instilling discipline in his troops, while at the same time questioning their manhood. That seems like a really difficult proposition. I was also immediately reminded of my own time spent in youth football. The punishment our coach handed down for fighting with a teammate was five laps around the field while holding the hand of the player you had scuffled with. I can't remember if that increased discipline or team unity, but in this case fans in College Station seem to trust Sherman's leadership.

"I like what I'm seeing," said one fan. "I know who is running this program."

Yeah, and this time you didn't even have to subscribe to an ultra-secret newsletter to find that out.

Courtesy of the little-known Every Day Should Be Saturday, the website with the most revolutionary stance on calendar realignment in decades, we bring you what appears to be a campaign video for Texas A&M's Yell Leader. It's called "Reload With Reagan," which just so happened to be the title of an NRA pamphlet during the 1984 election cycle.

What you're about to witness will demonstrate perfectly the canyon of a difference between your favorite team's fanbase and that of TAMU. It's part cheerleading, part propaganda, and part hand gestures that would get you kicked out of 99% of high school and college classrooms. Enjoy.



We don't care what you may claim about your team and your traditions and your fanbase. You don't do "crazy" like A&M does "crazy." They do it with aplomb, alacrity, vim and vigor. Oh, you're doing "the wave"? How quaint. The Aggies are too busy squeezing their own testicles. All hats are off, TAMU: we admire your complete severance from reality and request that you stay at least 75 miles away from us at all times.

A major reason to watch Texas A&M football over the past few seasons has been the sight of Jorvorskie Lane plowing his way through Big 12 defenses. Lane, a veritable brontosaurus in pads, always surprised me with his athleticism and agility in the Aggie offense. But with new head coach Mike Sherman installing a "pro-style" offense in College Station; Lane will apparently be switching positions this spring.

"Sherman said running back Jorvorskie Lane will have to adapt to being a fullback in the new offense. Mike Goodson and Bradley Stephens were the top two running backs in drills."

First, as a Nebraska fan who has some recent experience with an NFL head coach and a "pro-style" system, I have one thing to say to Aggie fans: "I'm sorry." Secondly, one of the great things about college football is the lack of emphasis it places on body types and measureables when it comes to lining guys up. If Lane's new role means increased blocking demands and diminished carries, we as fans are being cheated.

Even worse, however, is a hidden nugget from another spring report on Texas A&M:

"Sherman said he's challenging 277-pound running back Jorvorskie Lane to lose some weight, adding that he could afford to shed a few of his own pounds as well."

NOOOO!!! Say it isn't so, Coach Sherman. I like my Jorvorskie's huge and thundering. Now Lane is destined to be just another fullback with a funny name. And here I thought fatty running backs had become something of an institution at A&M. Is nothing sacred? Can an end to the 12th Man tradition be far behind?

ESPN did a smart thing in scheduling a college football game for last Thanksgiving. I don't really watch the NFL games so it was nice to sit down to USC playing Arizona State late in the evening. I had hoped it would begin something of a tradition for college football in having a marquee game on that night. That faith has been rewarded.

This year they've brought the Texas rivals together to play on the Holiday and as a bonus, it restores some tradition.

The Texas-Texas A&M football rivalry will move back to its traditional Thanksgiving slot for the next two years.

The longtime Thanksgiving event was moved to the day after in 1996. The switch back accommodates a Thanksgiving night ESPN broadcast, Texas athletic director DeLoss Dodds said Monday.

Texas and Texas A&M have played on Thanksgiving 60 times in a rivalry that dates to 1894.

Nice. After a string of six consecutive victories, Texas has dropped the last two to the rival Aggies (12-7 and 38-30). This year's meeting will be played in Austin.

Smart politics 101: ingratiate yourself with the fans of popular sports teams

Democratic presidential candidate and erstwhile hoops junkie Senator Barack Obama took some campaign time to hang with the Texas Longhorn football team today. Austin is friendly territory for any Democratic presidential candidate, so this was an easy call. Good luck finding as warm of a reception in College Station, Senator Obama.

Given the senator's eagerness to flash the hook 'em sign, his campaign just might find itself doing a little damage control among the Aggie vote. (Oh, who are we kidding. The Aggies are all Republicans, aren't they governor?)

Looks like he and the players had a good time, even sneaking in a requisite pose with the Heisman Trophy. Now's a good time to mention that although Texas coach Mack Brown is "agnostic" when it comes to politics, Bevo Beat did uncover a $500 donation from Brown's wife to the Obama campaign last march. No word yet on whether Brown was proud of his wife's political contributions for the first time in his life.

...at least that's the implication from his latest move, or lack thereof:

Former Texas A&M defensive coordinator Bob Davie has declined an invitation to reprise that role with the Aggies, according to a source on campus.

Hey, I'm with him. Davie gets to lounge around in the offseason while college coaches are beating their heads in day after day, sleeping on the floor in their office and only contacting their families when, delirious from lack of rest, they accidentally hit the wrong button on their cell phone. Much better to be Bob Davie, Guy Who Gets Paid To Say "Footbaw" A Lot.

This is actually a bit of a blow for the A&M program. Though Davie's stint as Notre Dame's head coach didn't go well, he was a successful and well-regarded defensive coordinator over the course of a decade.

We learned earlier today that Texas A&M had chosen a replacement for departed football coach Dennis Franchione. Former NFL head coach and current NFL assistant Mike Sherman has been named as A&M's new coach, signing a seven-year deal.

Sherman spent six years as head coach of the Green Bay Packers, compiling an impressive 57-39 record. Despite that mark, he was highly unpopular in Green Bay by the time he was let go by general manager Ted Thompson after the 2005 season.

He was snapped up almost immediately by the Houston Texans, where he worked as an assistant head coach last year and then as the offensive coordinator this year. Now, he moves back to Texas A&M, where he served as an assistant under R.C. Slocum in two separate stints.

Given how unhappy Aggie fans were with Franchione, I'm left to wonder if they'd be happy with the university hiring a paper bag to coach the football team. He went 32-28 in five years at A&M, and never got the program over the proverbial hump. They beat Texas the last two years, but there have been enough embarrassing losses along the way to make some people miss Slocum, who was also basically shoved out of town.

So there oughta be at least some sort of a honeymoon for Sherman.

But is this a good hire by Texas A&M?

The College Football Songbook is a weekly feature in which we'll be making as much fun as humanly possible of the most embarrassing moments in college football. Through words, music, and related video we'll leave a lasting memory implanted on the brains of the vanquished that they are not soon to forget.

It's everyone's favorite time of year, when coaches drop like flies mere days after getting the dreaded vote of confidence from the administration. I'm actually going to miss Ed Orgeron. But still, you let the program down, you gets the pink slip. Just don't let that door hit you in the ass.



Hat Tips:

Special hat tip as always to Pete Holiday for putting the video together.

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ESPN.com

The Star-Telegram is reporting that A&M's 11 AM press conference scheduled for today will introduce a new Aggie head coach:

Houston Texans assistant head coach/offensive coordinator Mike Sherman will be selected the new Texas A&M head coach, according to a source at the university.

Sherman is the offensive coordinator of the Houston Texans and is was head coach of Green Bay for six years, in which the Packers made the playoffs four times before slumping to a miserable 4-12 final year that got Sherman fired.

Is this a comedown for the Aggies after Old Ball Coach and Tommy Tuberville pipe dreams? On the one hand, Sherman is an NFL retread with little experience in the collegiate ranks -- his last college job was OL coach at A&M 11 years ago -- and we all know how those have worked out of late. On the other, Sherman has a pretty shiny record (57-39) for an NFL coach and has an equally shiny reputation for getting offenses up and going.

Either way, it's a major risk, and one A&M is making a whopping two days after Dennis Franchione resigned. A&M's search process makes the rumored Ferentz to Michigan switch look positively sluglike even if true.