It was supposed to be so easy (good lookin', Mike Skinner). Heavily recruited out of Danville, VA, J'Courtney Williams was a 4-star prospect set out to cover two needs for the Cavaliers, the first being the heir apparent to brilliant if somewhat foolhardy linebackers like Ahmad Brooks and Kai Parham. The other, well, it should be obvious how he could replace D'Brickashaw Ferguson.

Well, to paraphrase something Homer Simpson once said, Al Groh would be lying if he said his men weren't committing crimes. Williams only manifested the "foolhardy" portion of the bargain, getting involved in a low-level credit card scam that wasn't particularly bright in planning or execution. According to reports, a student claimed his wallet was stolen at the Virginia's main athletic center, and...okay. Stop right there.

Now, I realize that Virginia students tend to have a reputation as being well-to-do, and maybe I'm just getting old, but it's probably not wise to nab some poor teen's card when a: his parents probably see the bill and b: it's probably not blessed with the sort of credit limit you'd prefer for your jag/spree. Worse yet, Williams couldn't even be bothered to buy anything cool with his ill-gotten goods. Supposedly, he was found out after making 19 purchases at a Tuttle dorm vending... That's not even Treehouse ballin'. Maybe you can help me out in the comments, but I mostly remember Tuttle having a computer lab and I dunno, maybe some snack machines. And an elevator. That was pretty cool. But otherwise, you're gonna risk your college career for that? Then again, maybe the whole snack machine thing relates to his marijuana charges as well.

Groh was swift with the guillotine, and Williams has been dismissed from the program; all things considered between Olu Hall, Parham, Brooks and Williams, I probably shouldn't be so quick to criticize Groh for recruiting seemingly nothing but linebackers and tight ends. It's been mentioned that Louisville, Kentucky and Mississippi State were among the schools Virginia beat out for J'Courtney, and if I were a betting man, I wouldn't count out the one that took a flyer on Willie Williams. No relation?

"I know I be strapped with a double 4-4 and a slim jim to open your Cadillac door."- Redman, "One Shot Deal"

I don't think I need to go in any further about what they say about idle hands. I mean, the crap I get myself in when I'm bored is bad enough, and right now, I'm doing what I do most of the day in my various pursuits, namely, sit at a desk and look at a computer while dem dollas roll in. Suppose you're someone like Mike Brown, however. Though he's served as a cornerback and punt returner for Virginia over the past couple of seasons, his main gig was special teams gunner, meaning that his scholarship essentially is based on him trying to kill someone's head off for what amounts to about a few minutes per year.

I'm not sure how I'd handle my downtime if the aforementioned was my job description, but hopefully, I'd be able to handle it better than Brown has. In the latest addition to Virginia's Super Fun Happy Offseason, Brown was arrested by campus police and charged with grand larceny, possession of stolen property, intent to sell, altering serial numbers, and as an added bonus, marijuana possession. According to the Daily Progress, you're doin' a hell of a job, Brownie:

The charges stem from a Feb. 6 incident in which a music mixer, mixer box, camcorder and microphone were stolen from a car owned by UVa student Brendan Downey in the Central Grounds Parking Garage, according to a search warrant filed on Feb. 19. The stolen items were worth more than $3,400. On Feb. 9, Downey saw three of the items stolen from his car listed on eBay, according to the search warrant. The seller's eBay identifier was tied to Brown's roommate, a former member of the UVa football team. Downey notified police and also arranged to purchase the mixer, using Paypal. The mixer was not delivered. Downey left negative feedback for the seller on eBay.

I'm not gonna diss you on the internet? Screw that- burn!!1! Though my familiarity with the recorded output of Reggie Noble would have me believe that Brown has done his hometown well, this is just another reason why you should stay having a morally unscrupulous friend who works at Best Buy.

Not to be on the Morrissey tip with this story, but if this one sounds kinda familiar, well- there's good reason. Except at that point, it was pointed out to be speculation after the high school coach of UVA's standout DE Jeffrey Fitzgerald said that he had not left the University. Well, it might be time to love the Cavaliers only slightly less than you used to, as it's become official that Fitzgerald is not in classes this semester, joining fellow starters Jameel Sewell and Chris Cook as being AWOL from Cabell Hall (or any other learning facility at Virginia).

No one's talking about what's going on besides the fact that he's not enrolled right now, and WOW, this kinda sucks hard for UVA. It's been floated that Sewell might think about trying to come back for 2009, but something about this tells me the Hoos might not be so lucky with Fitz, who racked up 7 sacks and 2 INT's; the loss of Cook and Fitzgerald may very well constitute Virginia being without their two most effective pass defenders. In my time, I've known more than a few kids who took off time from classes before ultimately re-enrolling; apparently, working at Circuit City or as a Gumby's delivery guy is a good way to find ones self.

Still, if they're going down that road, it might help to avoid using your pizza route as a means of boosting your revenue from dimebags of C-ville shwag. Just sayin'. Now, thanks to that picture, we can easily segue into how Chris Long's intensity on the football field is being seriously underreported in draft discussions.

Al Groh doesn't have the reputation of being the friendliest guy in the world (a rep that's supposedly undeserved), but give him this much- he knows how to take care of his own. After an at-times dispiriting search for a new defensive coordinator, he is now flanked by his son and his best friend in coaching after the hire of Bob Pruett.

Now, if that name happens to ring some bells, it's likely that you remember Pruett from the Randy Moss/Chad Pennington teams from the late '90s at Marshall, where he achieved massive success. Either that, or his time as the DC under Steve Spurrier at Florida. As often as those teams won, however, I don't think they were primarily known for defense, but considering that Al Groh still has a lot of sway in terms of playcalling (in fact, rumor has it that he called all the plays for the last two years), who knows how much it will matter?

And yes, when you take into account that no athletic program might be having a worse 2008 than Virginia (have you seen the basketball team? Gadzooks!), pulling one of Groh's pals out of retirement at the age of 64 might not give anyone a lot to get excited about. But I actually see this as a potentially good hire, certainly one of the better ones in the Groh tenure. Yeah, it might be nice to get one of these maverick DC's that are magic on the recruiting trail, particularly in the 757 area code, but how's that worked out the last two times? Al Golden and Mike London leaped at pretty much the first head coaching opportunities that came down the pike (to London's credit, he did turn down the Old Dominion job, but to paraphrase a LL Cool J diss, 99% of their team doesn't exist). Which leads to the next point- high school coaches in Virginia have explained UVA's shortcomings on the recruiting trail as a result of a lack of staff continuity and Groh's perceived elitism and a Treach-style tendency to do his dirt all by his lonely. Pruett helps on this front; this is probably the last job he'll have, period, unless UVA managed to shut out USC in the season opener or something. Moreover, he has a reputation of being a "good cop" type that is revered by his players, and he has strong roots in the Northern Virginia region from his high school coaching days. Now, this may not do a whole lot for Virginia in the Tidewater region (beating VT more than once a decade would probably help), but UVA can use any edge in-state, particularly since neither Virginia OR Tech has been particularly adept at taking top-notch recruits from NoVA; they're just as likely to end up at Penn State, Notre Dame, Florida or even NC State. So while not a particularly innovative hire, it's still a solid one and solid is what Virginia needs right now. Besides, were any of these dudes better options?

The last thing we need here at Fanhouse is another lament about Virginia's self-inflicted wounds and bad luck, seeing as how the Gator Bowl sorta proved that few people outside the Old Dominion and east-coast metropolises give a crap about them.

That said, what was looking like an increasingly shaky recruiting class got a little bit stronger with the addition of two new verbals at need positions. Okay, it's a given when Al Groh is your coach that linebacker is going to be a need position, and they may have found themselves a good one in Solon, OH prospect Steve Greer. Rivals has him a three-star guy and Virginia managed to keep him away from decidedly non-Ohio schools such as North Carolina and Oklahoma State.

The more interesting and more needful snag comes in the form of Plano, TX's Riko Smalls, who officially has the awesomest name on the roster now. With Jameel Sewell out of the picture for the time being, Virginia is certainly in need of bodies, and Smalls is an intriguing fit, mostly because he was recruited by Wake Forest as a safety, and ESPN's scouting report has him as an "ideal spread offense player." In other words, an offense Virginia totally doesn't run and probably never will until Groh takes his son and goes home. Moreover, they already have an undersized QB that they tried to move to CB and Vic Hall's progress has been ... shaky.

Speaking of shaky, it's still incredibly troubling how Virginia appears to be completely outsourcing its recruiting outside the state, a trend that doesn't look to abate now that their most important in-state recruiter is gone. I mean, I'd expect Paul Johnson to be fighting off Air Force recruits this year, but not the reigning ACC COY.

Especially with John Tenuta shuffling off to South Bend, Virginia fans are getting as antsy as possible when it comes to finding a potential replacement for Mike London. Which is not to say that it's inevitably going to get bungled. The last two guys to hold it down at DC became head coaches. But it's difficult to think of too many candidates to get excited about.

Pepper Johnson is certainly one of the more intriguing candidates, intriguing because he's sort of a mystery as a coordinator. But even if the headline says that Johnson's "mum" about the prospect of commandeering a unexpectedly gutted unit, he sure doesn't sound that way. In regards to being a DC on the collegiate level:

"I don't know. Once again, that's something that is kind of difficult, because it all depends on who makes that phone call," Johnson added. "If The Ohio State University did, then probably I'd have to tell Bill [Belicheck] he's going to have to hang on there without me. "Other than that, I don't know."

Now, this may just be the Bill Belicheck approach to bullcrap media questions that have nothing to do with the week ahead showing its effect on Pepper. But to UVA, it's more of a sign that Al Groh has his work ahead of him, but if he's known for anything, it's turning on that charm and winning smile.

"B-b-b-b-but wait it gets worse!!!"- Sticky Fingaz

I'll admit that the original article I wrote about UVA signing on for a home-and-home against USC might have jumped the gun a little. Virginia's played extremely well at home under Al Groh, lord only knows what mood the Trojans will be in before their tilt with Ohio State and there was every indication that the Cavaliers would field that a team that could certainly compete for an ACC Coastal crown, even if they weren't at a level where they could realistically match wits with top-five teams. With the possibility of the offense getting another year to congeal and a defense that had been increasingly effective and aggressive under Mike London, hell- at the very least, they could've shocked the world by giving USC a run for it.

Of course, that was my line of thinking before the Hoos started hemorrhaging in 2008; to recap, they'll take the field against USC without the following:

- Possibly the greatest defensive player in school history, but at the very least, the highest draft pick of the modern era (Chris Long)

- Three fifths of the starting offensive line, including their most talented guard (Branden Albert)

- The popular and blitz-happy defensive coordinator who also happened to be the most important in-state recruiter (Mike London)

- The quarterback around whom the offense was completely retooled over the past two years to fit his skills (Jameel Sewell) ... to academics

- The best cover corner (Chris Cook) ... to academics

- Considering that the first of these was the only one to be expected, hope as well? More on that after the jump...

Before Sunday's win against Boston College at the John Paul Jones Arena, Virginia's sports programs didn't have much to shout about in 2008. They started the New Year with bowl season's most horrific collapse, watched their best offensive lineman declare for the draft, saw four players not enrolled in spring classes and lost the defensive coordinator to a 1-AA school. To top it off, the basketball team got waxed by Xavier and Duke, thereafter dropping their first home game to Virginia Tech in over four decades. Well, there's always lacrosse.

But even the win against the ACC-leading Eagles proved ominous, as Jameel Sewell, UVA's starting QB currently AWOL from classes, had courtside seats. Obviously, speculation has already begun in regards to what Sewell's future holds, not just at UVA, but in general. He's stated that he has no intention of declaring for the supplemental draft, wise considering that he's nowhere near the level of Dave Brown and Steve Walsh in terms of quarterbacking or Ahmad Brooks (the last Virginia player drafted in the DS) in terms of raw talent.

And while the most likely scenario finds Sewell transferring in the same manner that UVA's most recent academically troubled and erratic-armed QB did (Bryson Spinner), he left open the possibility that with a year of strong performance in the classroom, he might see Scott Stadium again in 2009. It's not beyond reason; Ottawa Anderson took a year off to sort out his admittedly foul-looking personal problems before returning two years later to make minor contributions as a wide receiver. But is it in Sewell's best interest? Or even Virginia's? It's abundantly clear that Virginia's only real option is to roll the dice with Peter Lalich at QB, even if the sophomore doesn't have any real backup in case he doesn't progress; the best options is the seriously untested Marc Verica or even current CB Vic Hall, who broke all kinds of records as a QB in high school. Were Sewell to return in '09, it would give Virginia its first truly capable backup in years, but by then, the offense stands to be markedly different than the one Sewell worked in during the last two seasons. Lalich is more of an NFL-type of quarterback and it's unlikely that Mike Groh will work the same TE/RB-only passing game ... not if he wants to win, mind you.

Here's the thing; although I'm sure it's more lurid and scandalous to talk about Jameel Sewell's academic status as crippling Virginia's 2008 season, I'll make the (correct) argument that officially losing DC Mike London to the Richmond Spiders has more serious implications. I mean, if you compare the performance of Sewell to that of London's defense, who was winning more of those close games in 2007, not to mention putting Virginia in the position to even win any games in 2006?

And while you can argue that Chris Long and Jeffrey Fitzgerald were the ones making the plays and not London, compared to his predecessor Al Golden, London's defensive schemes were more aggressive and not coincidentally, more effective. Moreover, London proved to be an invaluable recruiter in the DC area, and seeing as how Virginia Tech has the fertile Tidewater region on lock for the foreseeable future, the ability to mine the other parts of the state were absolutely crucial. Although linebacker Clint Sintim should emerge as the leader of the Cavalier defense, without London and Long, it certainly lacks an identity.

So, where to go for Groh? I can't imagine he has any more sons looking for work, so it appears as if he might rely on his substantial contact list. One can keep their fingers crossed for UVA grad and current GT DC John Tenuta, who supposedly was hightailing it to Ann Arbor with Les Miles. However, there's an indication that he'll resort to the buddy system, particularly in regards to Bill Belicheck; one name that's been bandied about as a possibility is New England linemen dude Pepper Johnson, who Groh oversaw as the Giants LB coach during the days of Bill Parcells. Other possibilities include former UVA CB and current Ravens LB coach Mike Pettine, former Duke HC Ted Roof, and former Texas A&M DC (yeeesh!) Gary Darnell. Whatever route Groh chooses to take, one can only hope (if in vain) he sees the long-term value in having a guy that knows the Old Dominion.

According to today's Cavalier Daily, Virginia ranks #1 in terms of black enrollment among US News' top schools. Check it out- it's pretty heartwarming. Other than that, if you're a fan of UVA sporting teams, just swear off the internet altogether today. None of it's good for you.

We'll get to Mike London later, but I'll ask you this- did you like what you saw from Peter Lalich in the Gator Bowl? Against UNC? Well, get used to it. Admittedly, I did have a post in the making questioning whether Jameel Sewell was a viable long-term solution for Virginia. While the offense was improving as it catered to Sewell's abilities, it was still remarkably limited in its options; blame it on the dearth of gamebreaking receivers or the fact that any pass that Sewell throws past ten yards can most generously be described as "an adventure." It can be an effective attack, but ultimately incapable of quick scores or big plays through the air.

This is no longer an issue, as Sewell and three other Virginia footballers (starting CB Chris Cook, WR Chris Dalton and freshman LB Darnell Carter) aren't enrolled for spring classes and will most likely miss the 2008 season, if not transfer altogther. Can't say this is too much of a surprise, seeing as how Cook missed the Gator Bowl and Sewell's academic standing had been shaky since day one. I guess my comparisons to Bryson Spinner are more apt than ever.