Every Thursday, Earl Sleek will conspire with his pen and scanner to bring you another installment of PuckToons. Hopefully you will find these amusing, relevant, well-drawn, or you're a person who is tolerant towards mediocrity.

Well, I had better do some explaining on this cartoon, which laughs at the legal issues surrounding various members of the Anaheim Ducks organization. Yesterday, team owner Henry Samueli was named in a civil fraud complaint against Broadcom Corporation, though the Ducks have stated that the complaint will not affect team operations. Of course the Ducks players have other legal issues of their own:

• Todd Bertuzzi is still involved in the civil suit with Steve Moore's career-ending injury, back from his days in a Vancouver Canucks uniform. I've actually never written about this (and don't intend to start today), so instead I'll direct you to the capable blogging hands of Tom Benjamin for this story.
• Ryan Getzlaf has found his way into a bit of scandal with the California Highway Patrol. A CHP captain has been placed on leave while authorities investigate allegations he "fixed" a ticket for the Ducks' all-star center.
• Brad May, so far as I know, isn't involved in any official lawsuit, but if you believe the comment left at Battle of California (featured at the bottom of this post), at least one Phoenix lawyer is trying to collect on a judgment.
• Chris Pronger is probably clean on the legal front, but he's so widely despised by non-Duck fans for his on-ice elbowing and stomping suspensions that I had to throw him in the penalty box with the other guys.

Quite the collection of legal issues facing these Ducks (did I miss any?). I sure hope Wild Wing has brushed up on his courtroom etiquette.

The other shoe finally dropped on San Jose Sharks head coach Ron Wilson today as the team announced that he had been dismissed and the search for a replacement would begin immediately.

I'm finding myself having a tough time saying much about this decision, as most of the hockey world knew all too well that if Wilson didn't manage to get his team -- seen as one of the most talented in all of hockey -- within striking distance of the Stanley Cup Finals this year, his tenure in the Bay Area would likely be terminated. And so it went.

In a little more than 4.5 seasons in San Jose, Wilson posted the most regular season wins (206) and the best winning percentage (.535) in team history. More importantly, however, was his 28-24 record in four playoff campaigns, never getting closer to the Cup than in 2004, when San Jose dropped the Western Conference Finals in six games to Calgary.

Late last night we passed along the information that long-time Washington goaltender Olie Kolzig wouldn't be back in a Capitals uniform next season. But over at ESPN.com, they might not actually notice that he's gone.

Take a gander at the screen shot I captured a couple of minutes ago. One thing is for sure -- that's not Olie Kolzig. This is Olie Kolzig.

So who is it? After a quick consultation with my colleague, Earl Sleek, we discovered that it's actually Anaheim Ducks defenseman Sean O'Donnell.

Hockey writers in Edmonton are notorious for being complete and utter morons who see the Oilers through rose-colored glasses, and rarely acknowledge the failures of their club.

The team misses the playoffs? Ah, there is always next year! The owner wants to gouge taxpayers to buy him a new arena? Oh, but it'll stimulate the economy in downtown Edmonton!

Witness this recent article by Robert Tychkowski, one of the biggest apologists for the reign of error that has plagued the Oilers for years. This 'mediot' takes time out of his busy schedule of ass-kissing and needlepoint to pen a gem about how the Dustin Penner deal ... wasn't so bad.

Every day from Monday to Saturday, The Ice Sheet will take a look at the biggest stories in the league that happened on the ice and elsewhere the night before.

Friday night, the defending Stanley Cup champion Anaheim Ducks had a great performance in Game Five against the Dallas Stars. Two nights later, that performance stands irrelevant. Last night in Game Six the Ducks were bounced from the playoffs by the Stars after a 4-1 defeat in Dallas. In one of the more unlikely of scenarios of the playoffs thus far, the Stars won their first playoff series in five years and shook off a horrific stretch run, showing the league that they mean business. Three of their four wins in the series came by three or more goals and they all came within a span of 10 days. That's twice the amount of wins the team had during the entire month of March. I'm not sure where this turnaround came from, but it sure is impressive.

But it was a big night in the Western Conference. While the defending champs were getting knocked out, a popular Stanley Cup pick was getting put to the test. In Calgary, the Sharks and Flames took the ice for Game Six of their quarterfinal series. Down 3-2 in the series, the Flames' season was on the line in this one -- and they came up big. Miikka Kiprusoff needed to make only 21 saves to earn the shutout victory as the Flames downed the Sharks 2-0 up north. Owen Nolan and Daymond Langkow had the tallies for Calgary, and now the series shifts back to San Jose for a pivotal, super ultra mega important, Game Seven on Tuesday night.

Four days ago, the Penguins wrapped up an easy sweep over the Senators. Tonight, the Stars just sent the Ducks to join their opponents from last year's Stanley Cup Finals on the golf course with a relatively easy 3-1 victory over the defending champs, taking the series from them 4 games to 2.

Honestly, I was kind of alarmed by how non-chalant the Ducks were this entire series and I doubt I'm alone in that aspect. The Stars dominated the first two games with two wins by a cumulative 9-2 win before the Ducks even woke up. After winning two out of three, the Ducks only managed 17 shots tonight with their season on the line in Dallas and the prospect of a home game 7 looming. That's not going to win a playoff game against anyone.

That is, of course, not to take away from what the Stars did in this series. Their power play dominated the first two games and Marty Turco was stellar in the whole series. After Corey Perry gave the Ducks a 1-0 lead tonight, Stephane Robidas and Stu Barnes scored in the first 130 seconds of the third period, then mostly dominated the rest of the third period until the Ducks late flurry of fruitless, desperate shots. Even then, the Stars managed to add exclamation points from Loui Eriksson and Mike Modano.

Four fourth period goals allowed and only 17 shots with their playoff lives on the line? Yeah, it's time to give the Cup to someone else.

Like my former FanHouse colleague, Greg Wyshynski, it isn't terribly often that I find myself in agreement with Larry Brooks of the New York Post. But this morning, as he broke the news that the NHL has fined Anaheim Ducks defenseman $500,000 for not reporting to the team until midseason. As Brooks writes:

[T]he league has sought to punish Niedermayer by fining him approximately $500,000 of his $6.75M salary for missing training camp, unilaterally invoking Article 15.3 (f) of the CBA that reads, "For each day a Player does not report to Training Camp without his Club's permission, his pay will be reduced by 1/275th of his annual . . . salary."

As Brooks goes on to note, the decision to fine Niedermayer is all the more curious considering the fact that Anaheim General Manager Brian Burke gave the sure-fire first ballot Hall of Famer permission to take as much time as he liked to make up his mind to decided whether or not to return to the lineup. After all, the intent of this clause seems pretty clear in that it was designed to punish players who would attempt to hold out while under contract, and that clearly wasn't the case with the Ducks and Niedermayer, where the back and forth was actually friendly.

So what's the story behind the fine? According to Brooks, the league is afraid that Niedermayer's example will set a precedent where other team's might look to stash higher-salaried players off the ice to get some cap relief over the course of the season, only to bring them back to the lineup later when the total cap hit will be fractionally less.

Every day from Monday to Saturday, The Ice Sheet will take a look at the biggest stories in the league that happened on the ice and elsewhere the night before.

When you take a look back at the FanHouse Western Conference Roundtable, there was a lot of disagreement. However, there was at least one point of unanimity, and that was the contention that the Dallas Stars weren't long for this world, especially as they were set to face the defending Stanley Cup Champs, the Anaheim Ducks, in the first round of the playoffs.

For us, the calculus was pretty simple: Dallas had lost 10 of its last 14 games and was going against an Anaheim team that seemed designed specifically for playoff success. Toss in an injury to superstar defenseman Sergei Zubov, and it seemed as if the Ducks were set to steamroll the Stars out of the playoffs.

Which I guess is why they play the games. With a 3-1 home win in Game Four last night, Dallas took a rather commanding 3-1 series lead over the Ducks. Anaheim threw 28 shots on Marty Turco last night, but didn't get a puck past him until only 7.6 seconds were left in the game. Heck, even Teemu Selanne ran Turco in the third period, but it wasn't enough.

Last night, the Ottawa Senators became the first team to be eliminated from the playoffs after being dispatched 3-1 by the Pittsburgh Penguins. Tonight, there is only one team on the slate with a chance to join the Sens on the golf course, but for two others their seasons could effectively be over.

The Boston Bruins are the only team that can be officially eliminated tonight, down 3-1 in their best of seven series against the Montreal Canadiens. To further their suffering, the game is taking place in Montreal, a city that is sure hockey mad right now. The Habs have not won a playoff series since prior to the lockout and you can bet their fanbase is going to be hungry for a victory tonight. According to WhoWins.com, the team leading a quarterfinals matchup in the NHL has advanced 95.3% of the time, so things aren't looking good for the Bruins. That being said, Boston is not out of hope just yet. The team up 3-1 has won Game Five 64.1% of the time, which isn't an overwhelming statistic. Things don't look good, but the Bs (who have put up a heck of a fight) aren't cooked yet.

Two other teams are in danger tonight. They're not facing elimination like Boston, but they might as well be. Both the Washington Capitals (not the Crapitals, as Mike Milbury would say) and the Anaheim Ducks are down 2-1 heading into Game Four of their first round series. Both teams are on the road and would be put in a precarious position if they were to lose and go down 3-1, even though they would be going back home for Game Five. You might as well call this moving day for these teams, even though this isn't golf. They better get moving otherwise they'll be sitting on the sidelines with the Senators soon enough.

Every day from Monday to Saturday, The Ice Sheet will take a look at the biggest stories in the league that happened on the ice and elsewhere the night before.

Well, if you're with me at this point that means you have made it through night number two of the 2008 Stanley Cup Playoffs. And what a night it wasn't. Of course, if your team won it was a great night but for the rest of us whose team either lost or didn't play ... Not so much.

Angel on my left shoulder: Kevin, you can't rain on their parades. It's the playoffs gosh darn it! This is what we crave. This is what it's all about. If you don't like this time of year, then you're a bad person ... Or just not a hockey fan. You get my point.

Devil on my right: Is this guy serious? #@$&! The Islanders are out of it. Who gives a crap. If these games aren't entertaining, then I'm not watching. You're right, Kevin. Screw it.

Me: Guys, I think you're both right. It's hard to care if the Isles aren't in it, but on the other hand, at least there's a good chance I'll get to see the Devils and Rangers have their hopes crushed. The Bruins made it this year, too. Maybe we'll get to see Mike Milbury cry on national television. Angel's got a good point. This is what hockey fans live for. If you don't like it then you're probably a communist baseball fan. I'm so torn. You're both right.

Angel: Well, maybe we could all go watch Everybody Loves Raymond. Everyone likes that show.

Devil: Seriously? That guy is a tool and his show is a joke.

Angel: He's cool! He's from New York like us!

Me: Hey! Hey! Everyone just calm down! Can't you see I'm in the middle of doing The Ice Sheet? I need to get this done for Friday morning.

Angel and devil: Sorry.

Me: OK. I'm sorry I had to put you, the reader, through all that. Regardless of how you feel about last night, there was a lot going on around the NHL, so let's get to it!