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Chicago Fire 2 - DC United 0
We're sure the whole untied/United headline business has been used before, but we're equally fed up with the various ways the Fire can burn, torch, or scorch opposing teams in the headlines. Regardless, the Chicago Fire ran circles around the United defense, putting on an offensive display that gave them several lethal chances. Justin Mapp and Cuahtemoc Blanco scored for Chicago, with Blanco's curling strike sure to set the bar for the Goal of the Week. A physical match that saw plenty of rough challenges on both side of the ball overshadowed DC's struggling offense. United only managed 2 shots on goal but drew 3 yellow cards for reckless play.

Chicago hosts Houston Dynamo at home next Saturday while DC United travels out west for a match with CD Chivas USA.

Photo courtesy of AP and MLSnet.com

A couple of hours after the death of Eight Belles at the Kentucky Derby, the political blogger Kevin Drum wrote this:

Hillary Clinton chose filly Eight Belles to win the Kentucky Derby today. Instead, EB came in second and then had to be euthanized after breaking both ankles right after crossing the finish line. So here's the contest: Who do you think will be the first pundit/columnist/talking head to use this as an idiotically extended metaphor for the state of Hillary Clinton's campaign?

I don't know who the first was, but I know that one of the dumbest came from the Chicago Tribune, which wrote this in a Thursday editorial:

The only filly in the crowded field crossed the finish line second, but the fans who'd bet on her still had one last gasp of hope. Perhaps some fortuitous technicality would disqualify the first-place finisher. But things got worse instead of better. We're talking about Eight Belles, who was euthanized Saturday after almost winning the Kentucky Derby. But we're thinking about Hillary Clinton.

After a prolonged controversy about whether his contract would allow him to participate, American Nick Diaz is officially on this weekend's Dream.3 mixed martial arts card in Japan. Here's a look at Diaz showing off his gym:

EliteXC officials had previously said that Diaz would be violating his contract if he participated in the Dream.3 card, but his trainer, Cesar Gracie, says they've worked out all the contractual issues and that Diaz will, in fact, fight the Japanese welterweight Katsuya Inoue. "I pulled an all-nighter with Nick last night, cutting weight, and getting him on the plain. So it's all good now," Gracie said, according to MMA Weekly.

The Dream mixed martial arts organization isn't particularly well known in the United States, and although HDNet will show it live on Sunday, the ungodly hour that it's shown (starting at 3 a.m. Eastern) means very few American fans will watch. But I like the way Dream is trying to carve out a niche for itself in the MMA world, and having Diaz involved should help it reach an American audience.

Somehow, it all comes back to Wigan Athletic.

Wigan is a small club that's been in the top flight of English football for only the last three years, and it's spent most of that time fighting for its spot in the Premier League. Last season, Wigan only avoided relegation on the last day of season with a win at Sheffield United. This season, they didn't stave off relegation until last week, when they upset Aston Villa, 2-0.

What's more, Wigan plays on the worst pitch in the Premier League. They share JJB Stadium with a rugby league club, which results in a torn up pitch that often still has yard-line markers on it during soccer games. It's the Premier League equivalent to playing in Salt Lake City.

Yet here is little Wigan having a huge say in the Premier League title race. Emile Heskey's last-minute goal against Chelsea cost the Blues two points in the standings -- two points which could have put Team Turmoil in the driver's seat for the league title. Now Wigan plays Manchester United -- who might be missing the injured Wayne Rooney -- at the JJB on Sunday, and Wigan manager Steve Bruce, a former United captain, is promising that his team will leave it all on the pitch on Sunday.

Wigan Athletic. Who would have thought they'd be in the middle of all this?

Whenever someone makes an all-name list of baseball players, there's always one name that seems to make the cut. He's not a great player but Stubby Clapp has one of the more memorable names of anyone who's ever played the game.

In addition to all-name teams, Clapp's been a mainstay of the Canadian national team since 1999. At 35, that's the only baseball he's still playing, though he's also the hitting coach for Class A Lexington in the Houston Astro system. Still, it's a shame the team has refused to give Clapp permission to play in Beijing this summer.

"The Houston Astros have turned down our request for Stubby to play for us," (Coach Greg) Hamilton told CBCSports.ca. "It's a blow. Stubby Clapp brings leadership to the team and in many ways is the face of the program."

The Astros position is understandable. They hired Clapp to coach and don't want to lose a month of his services while prospects could benefit from his tutelage. But, Clapp hurt his knee in Olympic qualifying and might not even be physically able to play. Why not figure out if it's even possible for him to play before rejecting it out of hand?

The difficulty getting big-name players is a big reason why baseball won't be at the 2012 Olympics. It would be nice if players who devoted themselves to the international game got a chance to go out in style this summer. Plus it would be nice to hear Stubby's name a few more times before he gets lost in the minors.

(H/T BBTF)

Newcastle United manager Kevin Keegan would like you to know something very important about the Premier League. It's getting a little stale.

"Maybe (Newcastle) owner (Mike Ashey) thinks we can bridge that gap - but we can't. This league is in danger of becoming one of the most boring but great leagues in the world.

"The top four next year will be the same top four as this year. What I can say to the Newcastle fans is that we will be trying to get fifth and we will be trying to win the other league that's going on within the Premier League."

Keegan makes a legitimate point. A vicious cycle exists in the Premier League right now, where the Big Four -- Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool and Manchester United -- finish in the top four every year, go to the UEFA Champions League, earn as much as £30 million more than all the other clubs, use that money to buy top players to strengthen their roster, finish in the top four again the next year, and so on and so on, until only four clubs have a real shot at the League title and the rest are left to fend for UEFA Cup scraps.

I believe, however, that there's a way to break this cycle.

Video games are so much better now than they were 20 years ago that this sounds ridiculous to say, but I can't believe there's ever been a better boxing video game than Mike Tyson Punch-Out:

There was just something perfect about that game, the ease of beating Glass Joe to get started, the tricks of learning how to beat King Hippo and Great Tiger and Bald Bull, and the excitement of facing Mike Tyson, who at the time was almost a mythical character.

So it's nice to learn that Tyson will be part of EA Sports Fight Night 4. We have a very, very different view of Tyson now than we had in 1987, when Punch-Out came out, but he's one of the legendary figures in video game history, and it's good to see that he's back.

One of the best things ESPN.com does is post a lot of videos related to mixed martial arts. That's particularly surprising because ESPN doesn't televise MMA, and fans of other sports, especially hockey, have complained that ESPN simply ignores the sports it doesn't televise. But here it is, the latest ESPN MMA video, a rundown of the world's Top 10 pound-for-pound MMA fighters, according to Sherdog:

I think we've reached the point where it's obvious to anyone who follows the sport who the No. 1 fighter on the list is going to be, but what about positions 2-10? For those who don't feel like watching the video to find out, the list is after the jump.

Olympic athletes often don't get paid to do anything other than look good. In that vein, Attractive Olympians handicaps which athletes may rake in endorsement deals after the Olympics.

Laure Manaudou is a world record-holder and Olympic champion, but it's the fallout from her love life that has garnered the biggest headlines.

France's first gold medalist in swimming in over 50 years found herself in the middle of a media firestorm when sexually explicit photos of her surfaced online after a public break-up with Italian swimmer Luca Marin at the 2007 Euro Championships. Before that fallout, Manaudou had raised the ire of French officials when she left her swimming club to join Marin in Italy.

Manaudou, now back in her home country with a new French boyfriend (swimmer Benjamin Stasiulis), looks to put this mess behind her with a strong performance in Beijing; three more medals will make her the most decorated French Olympian in history.

But amidst all this love and scandal and swimming, is Manaudou worth this kind of fuss? We at FanHouse steer clear of explicit content, but there's plenty more Manaudou after the jump to help you decide.

There's a good series of online videos called Interviews 50 Cents in which ordinary people sit down and have conversations about their lives. This installment features a player in the Independent Women's Football League, talking about what women's tackle football is like:

There are some moments of unintentional humor, such as the interview subject referring to a team as the D.C. Divas, only to have the interviewer mishear her and ask incredulously, "D.C. Beavers?" And there's the interview subject explaining how she sacked the opposing quarterback because, "I just pushed my way through the hole. I'm supposed to go through the A hole."

Snickering aside, though, I think it's great that there are organized leagues for women's football. The IWFL has a slate of 15 games Saturday. Might be worth checking out.