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Cinderella, Back and Badder Than Ever

By RAY HOLLOMAN,

AOL

Posted: 2008-03-18 17:57:28

Filed Under: Charlotte Regional, Detroit Regional, Houston Regional, NCAA Tournament, Phoenix Regional

Sports Commentary

Here's what we suggest you do with your brackets next Monday: Office-wide paper football challenge.

Photo Gallery

Jonathan Ferrey, Getty

Ranking
Cinderellas

1 of 10

10. Oregon | Seed: 9 | Region: South
Why the Slipper Fits: They've got the nation's fourth most efficient offense and last year went from bubble to Elite Eight. Besides, could you concentrate against five men dressed like bowling shoes?

Create your own paper mache Dikembe Mutombo and practice your best Mutombo voice.

Or, ball them up, aim carefully, and hurl them directly into the back of anyone's head who doesn't giggle at least a little at Austin Peay.

Because, frankly, they're not our people. And because no matter how comfortable you might feel advancing the top four seeds into the Sweet 16, here's what you won't be able to do with your bracket next Monday: Smugly congratulate yourself for picking with all the risk of a retirement.

This year, our favorite lady is back. No, not you Tawny Kitaen. Think less flammable. Think, Cinderella.

Starting Thursday, college basketball patron saint is back in town. Please, pass the lady some pretzels.

Last year, Cinderella punched the clock like a DMV employee. She showed up late, took off early and left a lot of folks grumbling over brackets that turned out to be nothing more than a dull set of paperwork. There were just two first-round upsets of more than a two-seed disparity and only Virginia Commonwealth's win over slumping Duke was worth watching. By the Sweet 16, seventh-seeded UNLV was the low man surviving.

Yes, in 2007, there was plenty of time to turn away from hoops and catch up on more exciting television, like C-SPAN. Or the channel that sells knives late at night.

But this year, Cinderella is back and she's been hob-nobbing with Brian McNamee at Jose Canseco's pool party. This year's Cinderella is ripped, ready and p.o.'ed -- you try squats in a glass slipper.

There's 12th-seeded George Mason, the team who is the brand name of Cinderellas in the way Kleenex is to tissue. There's Davidson, who has the nation's leading assist man, fifth-leading scorer, a winning streak that makes the Rockets look like Royals. And the Wildcats get to play at home for the first two rounds.

Photo Gallery

Jonathan Daniel, Getty Images

Upset
Watch

1 of 11

Purdue | Seed: 6 | Opponent: Baylor
The best days may be behind the Boilermakers this year. Matt Painter's team hasn't beaten a top 50 team since Feb. 12 and now they run into the inspired
Bears of Baylor.

Want more name-brand recognition? There's No. 7 Butler, who's under-seeded and under-respected with players like featherweight guard A.J. Graves. The Bulldogs finished 29-3 this season and return the same team that came within one slickly coiffed Billy Donovan hair of knocking off Florida in the Sweet 16. St. Joseph's beat third-seed Xavier twice in the last two weeks to play its way into the NCAA Tournament and may not stop winning until the Hawk stops flapping its arms or coach Phil Martelli starts growing hair, whichever comes first.

And we know Billy Packer will be rooting them on.

Then there are the characters, like Kent State's Haminn Quaintance, who wears his socks to his knees and marks introductions by tapping his head on the backboard. His stat line reads: Ten points, 7.5 rebounds, 2.1 assists, 1.8 steals, 2.0 blocks, three ink pens to record it all. There's the St. Mary's Gaels, led by the Australian Patty Mills, who might just be good enough to undo the diplomatic damage done by Crocodile Dundee III. And if ever there were a cast of characters worth rooting on, it's the Baylor Bears, who earned a spot in the NCAA Tournament five years after the tragic murder of Carlton Dotson. Or the Georgia Bulldogs, who beat four teams and one tornado to earn a bid.

Then there are the polar opposite first-round matchups, like Cal State Fullerton, the nation's fifth-highest scoring team, pitted against a grind-it-out Wisconsin program that still grumbles that the forward pass ruined college basketball. Georgetown might have an easy time in the first round against tournament newbie Maryland-Baltimore College, but only if it can handle the most ferocious in-your-knees defense in college basketball. The Retrievers get 82 percent of their scoring from players 6-foot-4 and under.

If you need a little pedigree on your Cinderella's resume, major programs like eight-seed Indiana, 10-seed Arizona or 12-seed Villanova, who have five NCAA titles between them are your best. With nine-seed Oregon, you get a former national champ, a power conference pedigree and a team that dresses like Willy Wonka's footwear.

Even the ultimate football Cinderella, Boise State is crashing the field. The Broncos survived a triple-overtime title game in the WAC and we can only assume have the greatest Statue of Liberty play known to basketball.

And as always, there's Gonzaga, who every year are the 12 scrappiest players in the NCAA Tournament and the only 12 men from Washington not sired by Shawn Kemp.

Three of these would-be Cinderellas -- Davidson, Gonzaga and St. Mary's -- rank in the top 11 in scoring differential, typically one of the best indicators of a lower-profile teams' success. Ten teams seeded seventh or lower are in the top 30 in scoring differential, so keep an eye on Michael Beasley and Kansas State, Western Kentucky, Cal State Fullerton and Indiana.

Mens College Basketball

Kansas basketball coach Bill Self poses with students in Boys Town, Neb., Wednesday, May 7, 2008. Self, who visited Boys Town before appearing at an Omaha sports banquet in the evening, said he'll have no idea what the roster for the defending NCAA champions will look like until after June's NBA draft. (AP Photo/Nati Harnik)

Kansas basketball coach Bill Self, center, jokes during a visit to Boys Town, Neb., Wednesday, May 7, 2008, as he stands near Boys Town Executive Director Steve Boes, left. said he'll have no idea what the roster for the defending NCAA champions will look like until after June's NBA draft. (AP Photo/Nati Harnik)

Kansas basketball coach Bill Self, left, takes questions from students during a visit to Boys Town, Neb., Wednesday, May 7, 2008. Self, who was in Omaha for a sports banquet, said he'll have no idea what the roster for the defending NCAA championship team will look like until after June's NBA draft. (AP Photo/Nati Harnik)

** FILE ** In this Jan. 9, 2008 file photo, LSU's Garrett Temple (14) knocks the ball away from Mississippi State's Ben Hansbrough, right, and Temple eventually ends up with the ball during the first half of a college basketball game in Baton Rouge, La. Hansbrough, who helped Mississippi State advance to the second round of the NCAA tournament last month, is transferring to Notre Dame. (AP Photo/Bill Feig, File)

Memphis head coach John Calipari smiles as he answers a question at a news conference at the college basketball Final Four in this April 6, 2008 file photo, in San Antonio. Calipari has signed a contract extension through the 2012-13 season that includes an annual raise of $500,000. Calipari will make $2.35 million per year and will receive a $5 million bonus if he stays through the end of the deal, athletic director R.C. Johnson announced Saturday, April 26, 2008. (AP Photo/Eric Gay)

** FILE ** This March 27, 2008 file photo shows Texas guard D.J. Augustin (14) smiling during a news conference at the NCAA South Regional basketball tournament in Houston. All-American point guard D.J. Augustin says he is leaving Texas after two seasons to turn pro. He said Wednesday April 23, 2008 that he has long dreamed of playing in the NBA and that he is "ready to start living this dream." (AP Photo/Eric Gay, File)

** FILE ** In this March 22, 2008 file photo, Mississippi State guard Jamont Gordon responds to a question during a news conference at the NCAA men's basketball tournament South Regional in North Little Rock, Ark. Gordon has decided to turn pro but won't hire an agent before the NBA draft. Gordon told The Associated Press he planned to file the paperwork. In a phone interview Tuesday afternoon April 22, 2008, Gordon said he intends to go through with the draft if he remains injury free. (AP Photo/Sue Ogrocki, File)

** FILE ** In this March 23, 2008 file photo, Mississippi State guard Jamont Gordon (44) takes a shot as Memphis guard Antonio Anderson (5) defends in the first half of an NCAA men's basketball second-round South Regional game in North Little Rock, Ark. Gordon has decided to turn pro but won't hire an agent before the NBA draft. Gordon told The Associated Press he planned to file the paperwork. In a phone interview Tuesday afternoon April 22, 2008, Gordon said he intends to go through with the draft if he remains injury free. (AP Photo/Sue Ogrocki, File)

** FILE ** This March 19, 2006 file photo shows Bucknell basketball coach Pat Flannery pleading with an official during the first half of their NCAA tournament second-round basketball game against Memphis in Dallas. Flannery is retiring after 14 years on the bench at his alma mater. A person at the university told The Associated Press of Flannery's retirement Friday morning, April 18, 2008. (AP Photo/Donna McWilliam, File)

** FILE ** Memphis coach John Calipari talks with Memphis freshman guard Derrick Rose (23) in the first half of the NCAA South Regional basketball final in Houston in this March 30, 2008 file photo, in Houston. Rose announced on Tuesday, April 15, 2008 he was jumping to the NBA, the same day Calipari agreed in principle to a contract extension with the school. (AP Photo/Eric Gay, File)

If you had selected teams seeded ninth or lower ranked in the top 50 in scoring differential last year, you would have correctly pegged both Winthrop (sixth) and Virginia Commonwealth (23rd) for the only two first-round upsets. You would've also correctly slotted Xavier to advance as a nine-seed (and the Musketeers came within a miracle 3-pointer of knocking off finalist Ohio State) and UNLV (33rd) as the lone Cinderella-ish team to make the Sweet 16. Only Belmont, who you should have avoided as a 15 seed, Texas A&M-Corpus Christi, a No. 15 that gave No. 2 Wisconsin all it could handle, and No. 10 Davidson, which nearly beat Maryland, would have let you down.

Meanwhile, No. 8 seed Mississippi State is second in the nation in field goal defense (thanks to human basket lid Jarvis Varnado, who led all Division I in blocks). Gonzaga ranks in the top 50 in both field-goal percentage offense and defense, both exceptionally useful indicators of possible upsets. If only the Zags didn't' have to travel cross-country to face Davidson in the Wildcats' backyard, the Bulldogs would be an excellent sleeper Elite Eight pick.

Of course, Cinderella does have a few problems. Butler, South Alabama, St. Joseph's, George Mason and Winthrop are all packed tighter than a rush-hour No. 2 train in the East, a region the Lakers might not advance out of. The Jaguars and Bulldogs even have to face each other in the first round, as do fellow mid-majors Davidson and Gonzaga in the Midwest.

And this year's crop of No. 1 and No. 2 seeds are as strong as any year in recent memory.

But if Davidson can't make it to the Elite Eight for you, go ahead and take your frustrations out on the guy next to you. After all, that's exactly what your brackets will be useful for. Cinderella is in for one heck of a weekend.

Bracket Bits:

Our Final Four: North Carolina, Kansas, Texas, UCLA (national champion).

Best First-Round Matchup: No. 8. Indiana vs. No. 9 Arkansas (East). There's more talent here than their seeds indicate and if you don't have to worry about an obnoxious fan near the bench yammering away on his cell phone as the game is going on. Kelvin Sampson has already been fired.

Fennis Dembo Best Name Award: Longar Longar, Oklahoma. Better than Georgetown alum Ruben Boumtje-Boumtje, but not quite as good as Wisconsin's Duany Duany.

Most Likely to Be Our Boss Bowl: Stanford vs. Cornell. Assuming, of course, that smart people actually chose sports writing as a profession. Expect the most erudite smack talk you've ever heard and possibly a general knowledge lightning round in lieu of overtime.

Toughest Bracket: East. North Carolina, Tennessee, Indiana, Notre Dame, Louisville, Butler. What, the Rockets didn't have a good enough RPI?

Easiest Bracket: West. Pencil in UCLA and spend your free time pondering if a Kevin Love outlet pass could bring world peace.

Best Potential Storyline: Can Indiana's Dan Dakich do it again? In 1984, Dakich locked down national player of the year Michael Jordan and the overmatched Hoosiers knocked off a North Carolina team featuring Jordan, Brad Daugherty and Sam Perkins. Daugherty and Perkins both became NBA All-Stars while Jordan developed a highly successful career as an underwear salesman. Now the interim head coach, Dakich could get to try his magic again in the second round, assuming the Hoosiers advance past Arkansas.

Upset Watch: No. 11. St. Joseph's over No. 6. Oklahoma.

Don't Buy the Hype: George Mason. There's no better coach or motivator than Jim Larranaga, but there's no Jai Lewis on this team capable of stopping Notre Dame's Luke Harangody.

2008-03-18 08:04:21